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It's funny how people seem to think that I'm all that great, just because I make the art I do, and I voice my opinion here in an occasional journal-article. Like any other artist out here, I have my own doubts about my art, and I have a hard time facing them every now and then. I'm not perfect. I'm far from where I want to be. And lately I'm quite uncertain of where I want to go with my art. It's something that is bothering me quite a bit, and blocked my creativity.

When I started doing art again, somewhere at the start of 2010, I used to very very insecure about my art. I never joined contests because I'm terribly afraid of failing. Honestly, I would feel bad about myself for weeks if I didn't at least end up in the honorable mentions. I never made tutorials because I was afraid one of DA's members would come up and say to me: "Why are you teaching this shit? You don't know anything about art!". And although I never liked to do fanart, I wouldn't probably have dared to do it either. Afraid that my art would be an insult to the original character/creator. Yeah, back then I just worked quietly on my own projects, because it was no contest, and nobody would be angry to me about messing up my own characters. To some degree, I didn't really want to get noticed. Because getting noticed, usually meant people starting to form an opinion over you. And yeah... there would always be people that would't just like me.

Back then, I used to think that that insecurity was a logical kind of thing. I mean, my art sucked. I had all the reason to feel bad about it. And I couldn't just imagine that there existed people with art worse than mine that felt great about their work, because I never did. To my idea, feeling secure was related to some degree of skills and appreciation. 

I couldn't be more wrong.

Back in the time, I was quite uncertain about my skills. The one thing, however, that I was certain about, was my own project. By then, I'd been writing novels for years. Not professional, of course. I probably wouldn't be able to bear the shame of being rejected by a publisher (let alone that the Dutch market is extremely hard to get published in, due to me not able to write proper English). But at that point publishing didn't really matter to me. It's true that in my dream world the project would've been translated to English and gone worldwide, but what writer doesn't secretly dream about that? 
Anyhow, the publishing wasn't by far the main goal. I wrote because I loved to write. And I drew because I loved to create an image of those characters and scene's that had been in my head for so long. Writing on my book, or drawing something related to it, somehow always made me feel good. Just like many people watch movies or play games to get lost in a world, I just loved creating my own world and just get lost in it. And I was fine with not being known, because I didn't actually want people to say harsh things about my characters. They were characters I created. And although they had their flaws, I liked hem. 

Nowadays I'm way past that point in which people didn't know me. In just a few years of time I generated quite the buzz for my own project. A project from which I never would've thought anyone (except me) would like it. I mean; I was like a depressed teenager when I first thought that stuff up (hence the very emo-ish looking first project drawings). I never expected people to like that. I didn't intent to create it that way either. It's true that I posted stuff online. But that's more since I initially had a very small group of followers (most of them were also Dutch writers -- and we helped each other with our novels), but I never really expected people outside of that group to follow it. 

What's the point then? -- many people would ask me. Well, the point is that, although the fanbase changed, my insecurity hasn't really changed that much. In my case, it was probably never related to skill. I didn't feel good enough back then, and I still don't feel so now. And even if I had the skill to earn tons of money with just painting, I wouldn't probably feel good enough either. My insecurity is related to being rejected in doing the thing that you most love to do. In my case; art, or writing. 
I'm usually fine with criticism. I don't particularly like it (who does?) but I get a lot of it in my working environment. So I've gotten used to it, and I can handle it quite well. The point is; although work is something I love, it's just work. It's not something I pour my soul into. And it certainly doesn't hurt so badly when people tell me I suck at it. 

It's weird to realize that something I started doing, just to feel comforted, has evolved in something so... widespread. Nowadays there are people that refer to me as being an example of what they want to do with art. And although I haven't got a clue why, I kinda feel the pressure there. If people refer to me as an example... does that mean I should act like one? Does that mean I cannot fail, or I will disappoint people? Although it's really not intended that way, that's a whole damn lot of pressure. And it's bothering me. Because it's making me doubt every move I make, and it's taking out the fun from just drawing and writing because I want to. 

I lately came to rewrite the first book of my novel series, since it's already 7 years old, and it doesn't fit so well with the rest of the storyline. I first thought about rewriting little parts, but once I started revising the original chapters, I soon came to the conclusion that just correcting a few things wouldn't do it. So I decided I wanted to do a rewrite. Nothing bad about that. And in a way, I kinda looked forward to writing it, since it's really fun to write about the same characters that you're used to -- but then younger, and uninfluenced by all the 'mistakes' you wrote years ago. A fresh restart!

So I started writing, but ended up staring at a white screen... far longer than was good for me.
I felt totally blocked. Before I started writing, I had many good ideas. But I started doubting all of them. I started doubting if the ideas were good enough. If it wouldn't make my characters either too stereotypical, or too weird. If I should change stuff about my characters, to make them different. If the storylines would be realistic enough to find believable... and whatnot. You get my point. Hopelessly artblocked. And the point is; art isn't much better either. The amount of followers here is fun, but it's building up the pressure to post actual good stuff on here, like full fledged digital art. Stuff I don't always feel I can make. And the more people compliment me here on my rapid improvement, the more bad I feel about not improving so much at the moment. It's a negative spiral. I'm well aware of it. I just don't know how to break out of it.

So that's where I am.
I posted this whole damn long message about me being artblocked and not having a clue how to get out here. Somehow, it feels like failing to admit this. But I think it would even make me feel more miserable to just disappear from the internet and keep up the appearance of being oh-so-perfect. I'm not perfect. I'm just another artist, like you. I'm insecure about my skills, probably like many others. And I messed up. But at least I have the guts to admit it.
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:iconlunastarfox:
lunastarfox Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
till this day I'm still very insecure about my art and there of people in the real world criticize me on my art and why i should even keep on drawing  I'm still to shy to advratize my art but hopefully once i get more practice i will be able to explore and get more out there    right now I'm trying to deveope my own style  which to me is nearly impossible   but thaks to you ur journal helped me a lot and yet i know i have lots of improving to do i hope one day to get better  because i love drawing and its just what i do  and i know I'm not perfect I'm far from but i guess its just who i am    a lot of great artists these days tend to think they are perfect and make people who are not as good feel bad and   u being a great artist actually cares and helps people and i just wantd to say thank you   for all the support to a lll the fellow artists and i hope things will be good for you in the future      anyway keep up the great work :D
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:iconeirikiss:
Eirikiss Featured By Owner Mar 8, 2014  Professional Traditional Artist
This is soooo me! Thank u :)
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:iconasaber-eleanen:
Asaber-Eleanen Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I realize this was posted a long time ago...and I probably missed the right time to actually comment, but I would like to say, I think you're an amazing person. Not just an amazing artist, not just a intelligent person, but an exceptional human being. Artblocks the worse...it really is, and you have probably already gotten over it, because you posted this so long ago, but I still felt like I should put my two cents in. Sorry if its too late, or silly. But sometimes it seems like the best thing you can give a person is a little bit of hope. You say praise of your art makes things worse, so I wanted to say this. From what I've read from your journals, and the amount of times you've saved me from giving up on art, just from your kind and wise words, I can tell your a great person. As far as the internet, and Deviant art, you are one of the most inspiring and kind people I've had the honor to talk to. I know this doesn't always help, but I hope 2014 brings a lot les artblock and insecurity, and a lot more joy.
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:icondamaimikaz:
DamaiMikaz Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:hug:
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:iconmateograph:
MateoGraph Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2013  Professional Artist
There no need to judge.. just share constructive criticisms and points of view.If somebody never doubts doing art , he s   not artist ...maybe just a money machine or megalomaniac^^
I personally think that "making art" or create is easier than "live" Even if my work always brings doubts, questions,choices ,the most important is to Do (even if i find a stuff shity , i m already thinking about the next one ^^)
My canvas , sculptures... are not "my babies"  :      - when i finish a work , "it s dead " its  time life was during its making."This is just art after all" , not a sacred thing like businessmen speculation (or religions did centuries ago)
The only way to make it "survive" a little more after building is when a work is a source of sharing ideas,questions.. while an exibition,with friends..so it s not sterile,barren.

And Virna , don t worry about technic ..just a matter of patience,time,work and eye's education ,the important is your approach,thought process ..don t need to do complex things 
to express ideas or poetry;) i went to art schools and didn t listen to teacher ....and got a certificate with congratulations of board of examiners (that means nothing^^)
Most of business artist doubt too but they just don t show it , just an attitude to seem strong and professional, just varnish,disguise.Nothing to be impressed ,lies and emptyness
I humbly and sincerely think that real artist are not those who sell or in museums,appear on media.. ,  only those that work with their heart and soul  
Maybe my point of view is "romantic,immature or from the past " but i ll keep my integrity even if i have to sleep on the street^^
Hoping my english is enough clear..^^
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:iconthausgt:
thausgt Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2013
Fear cannot be reasoned with. It comes from a part of the brain that evolved long before language or abstract thought.
Sometimes, blocks fall if you just slog your way through them. Just draw something, anything, regardless of how "good" you think it is.
I'm a writer, myself, so I understand something of what you're going through, and sometimes I can sneak around writer's block if I set the "major work" aside and start playing with something that "means nothing". Sometimes all it takes is giving yourself permission to fail... and thereby permission to succeed in a different way than you expected.
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:iconkawaiikiddo:
KawaiiKiddo Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You said in the journal that when you started to do your art again in 2010 you didn't join contests because you were scared if failing :D even thought you're far over my skills, I want to tell you this: the point with contests is to show your skills to other at same time you having fun!
And in contests you sees others art and art style, get some hint of their art so you can improve your own! :D that is actually whole the point with DA
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:icon0l50nj4:
0L50NJ4 Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
"I'm insecure about my skills, probably like many others. And I messed up. But at least I have the guts to admit it."
I totally respect this and applaud you for admitting this whole thing, and you're totally RIGHT, at least you DO have the guts to admit it. unlike others out there (and it seems to be nearly everyone) at least you're BRAVE enough to tell the truth. :D :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :)
And don't worry, I'm not anywhere near as good as anyone on here but I'm in the same place as you, don't worry you're not alone, not at all. :)
:hug: :hug: :hug: :love: :love: :love: :)
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:iconscarlet-wings-kaili:
Scarlet-Wings-Kaili Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2013  Student
^-^, I think whenever a risk is taken, there's a sense of fear. I don't know if this will help, but I totally know what you mean. When I was little, cause I had language delay, people thought I would be one of those "stupid" kids (one teacher actually called me that but that's beside the point.) Because of that, I was discouraged, thinking, I'll never be able to write well, always be a failure. But thank god, I had the best parents ever and supported me, because I did love stories, just couldn't imagine writing them. Somehow, failing school wasn't what happened, and one day, a teacher told me that I should join Creative writing. I think, it was around then when I realized that maybe I don't have to be creative for other people. This could be for me. Just me, just my private library. Although I am still really insecure about what people think about my work (because creative things should be shared) to me, my growth is more important to me. So, I think that making art (including writing as art) for yourself is more important than making art for others. So what if it's rejected. Van Gogh (I think I spell that right?) sold one painting in his lifetime. That didn't make him any less amazing. So I think, maybe it's not the work you are insecure about, maybe it is the risk that you are afraid of. That's just what I think. Easier said than done though. I often feel the same way as you about my art and writing. I remember the first time I had to read my story in front of the other Creative writers. This person who is giving you this advice hid behind a book. I still feel nervous showing my work, but nervousness should be a natural reaction to having another person read/see my work. Maybe that's because I fear that their opinion of me will change, or maybe it's just too dark (why I will never show some of my stories) and even I'm wasting that time. It's a horrible feeling. To make it worse, I know that I am a good artist, so I feel horrible if I complain. How am I supposed to answer: "That's so good!" when I think it's horrible. I don't want to feel like a show -off or seem snobby. I swear that is the last comment I want to hear (and it is a nice comment) not because it's almost the only thing I hear, but I really have no words for it. I feel I have to get even better because of this insecurity and it is not a bad thing, but I also feel can't gain anything. So in a way, I like criticism better because I know what to work on. So I think, if this is stressing you on, remember this is for you, not me, not anyone else. Remember if you share, real artist who know how the risk feels like will support you and who thinks its trash or something aren't real artists. They are just show-offs. Art blocks suck, but sometimes they need to happen for you to learn something else.
I figure, if you keep trying to get better and better, work will tend to get better lol.
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:iconbumpytheshroom:
BumpyTheShroom Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2013  Professional General Artist

It happens. Offten for us. Just go with the breakdown. Some record every thought during the break down, to use later, but what ever you choose- just let it flow. There is catharsis in it. Break down. Let it all crumble around you, let yourself crumble, and when there is "nothing left", when you are empty, remember this:

 

You.

 

You are feeling empty. You are there. The pieces are fallen all around you, but there you are.

 

Continue forward from that point. Continue forward to your next break down, and do it all again.

 

That's the one lesson I've learned well enough to feel confident to advise others in. Don't die, just shluff of the old, break under the pressure, let it all go, and then move forward through the dark, the empty, the directionless forward. Really, that's the only direction you ever go, however it may appear. There is no shame in the cleansing that comes from the loss. There is always more to move toward.

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:iconboxingglovehands:
boxingglovehands Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
i like to be creative with my work, though i need to be able to be persective perfect, it's a challenge, i hope you understand, i wanna say that your art is superb, be possative, that is all you gotta do! have you thought about how to be that way with your art and your imagination, it's all good in the end is what it all boils down to........................don't give up easy either, that is also a no go area!
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:iconpistachioinfernal:
PistachioInfernal Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2013
I'm a terrible artist. Truly, I am. But I will never improve without trying. And don't worry about being messsed up, some of the best people I know are messed up. :)
I'm glad that you came to this realization and feel better. Very brave of you to post about it. Clap 
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:iconleondaydreamer:
LeonDaydreamer Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2013   General Artist
To be honest with you and anyone else that left a comment, I'm sorry if I repeat you, but I don't have the time to read 130 or so comments. Anywho...

I Know exactly what you mean in everything you've said. As a fellow writer, I know what you mean in that you fear what it is other people think of your work especially since you paint and and draw as well. I actually started writing in high school in a class i really didn't expect to like. Creative Writing I, and when I first entered the class, I was surprised by the number of people there. Thinking it over, I half expected most of them to be looking for an easy grade. By the end of the year, I was awing over everyone's pieces and talking with them all about what it is they do and want to do. It took me quite sometime to realize it, but the class slowly turned to me for endless opinions about their works, and the teacher referenced any of the works I had shared with her in almost any moment she had. I was astounded and extremely honored, but then I quickly grew concerned with what it is other people think of what it is I do and say. Of course people arose that completely disagreed with me on almost everything, but something I was always taught to do since I was little, was to understand what it is others are trying to say, because everyone and everything has a story, which leaves them with a reason, purpose, and a lesson to learn from. From all those that stood up against my pieces, calling them "trash" and "no good" (Which actually wasn't too often to be honest) only made me stronger in where I stand and open my mind to another world in which their opinions reside, for who they are isn't wrong, but what they say isn't necessarily true either. I think that in facing those that oppose you, as an artist can only make you stronger if you understand what it is they have to say and why. The only time you can be brought down in anything, not only art, is if you fail to understand why it is people say what they say, and refuse to accept that who you are is not who they are, and that who they are isn't a negative influence in your life, but another window for you to expand yourself through... Whether someone likes it or not, doesn't mean you should quit or continue. What makes you happy and what doesn't is what decides where you will go. What you feel as an artist is what puts together your work despite of who you are or what you look like. It puts together who you are, and no one can deny that. Those that refuse to understand only limit themselves.

Stand strong for who you are and what you signify! Understand yourself and others, and I'm sure things will indubitably make sense despite whether your opinions are the bipolar opposite of another's, because Understanding is the key to Everything
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:iconensaru64:
Ensaru64 Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I experience this a lot myself, but expectations is a terrible thing, especially when it's from yourself. 

Try to make your love for drawing more like fun than like work. Of course, I'm unable to tell you how, since I'm experiencing this myself, but all those criticisms are really all in our heads. Maybe doing something you like may help relieve the stress.

Remember this: People say we can't control our feeling but that isn't true. We feel what we want to feel. There's nothing bad about being angry or sad or even depressed. It's just the way we feel we must feel at the moment. So don't try to make it go away or it'll get worse.

Sometimes, you just need to let it all out.
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:icondavidtheswede:
DavidTheSwede Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Welcome to the world of art! I think you have summed up most writers and artists feelings. I am sure I have heard/read  many artists and writers say that they have produced what they consider "good stuff" in their darkest moments!  I suspect no artist is satisfied with what they have produced (or if they are the feeling lasts only for a short time as the next creation looms) and will try and produce something that, in their mind, is better. At the end of the day you are doing art for yourself. Whether others like it or not is beyond your control and therefore not worth worrying about (easier said than done). 

If your tutorials etc help others than feel good about this. They help people in their own doing. Keep on producing these if you enjoy it or write on site that you are taking a break (I have seen several artists do this). 

Your own art is seperate from your tutorials and probably reflects you just now. Never compare to others or previous art works. Just do what you feel like now. Enjoy the process and try not to think about the end result. Like everyone else you will do artwork you really like, some which is OK and others which you don't like. 

If you have a creative block then you could try:

1. Doing something else completely different and coming back to art when you feel you want to. I had a break of about 15 years!
2. You could try going out and taking photos and seeing if any of the images spark off an idea. 
3. Look at other peoples work and see if you could develop ideas (for example I saw someone on DA who had done some fantastic insect pictures....this got me looking at insects and saw how fasinating they are).
4. Join an art group where you can discuss in real life and do workshops. The internet is all well and good but still remains fairly impersonal.
5. Just do it. Sit down and try something. Look at a you tube clip and try and recreate what they have done.
6. Have a routine where you sit down, say between 19 och 21:00 and see if anything comes. If not at least you tried!
6. Try some form of relaxing whether it be meditation, tai chi, yoga. They help calm the thoughts!

If your block is due to you worrying about what people may or may not think then this is an unknown and again beyond your control. Unless you are a mind reader you will never know what other people really think. As people go through life (I am 48 by the way!) their ideas and thoughts change. Some of your biggest fans may suddenly be interested in something else. Some people who have never seen your work may suddenly come across it and be inspired. Some may write nasty comments. Some may write upplifting comments. 

Now the big question is do I do any of these things. Yes I do. Do they help? Sometimes and other times I just have to accept my negative feelings and try not to dwell on them. They are after all just feelings!

The art world is beyond comprehension. I fail to understand why some works of art are successful and some aren't. It just is. Keep doing what you want to do and don't do it to please others! 

If any of this makes sense then all well and good. If you think it is all a load of rubbish then all well and good. Now I must start another picture.....mmmmmmm.........maybe I'll make a cup of coffee!!!!!







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:iconhypnagogic-haze:
Hypnagogic-Haze Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2013
I've learned that criticism is actually a great thing. I mean constructive criticism of course. If someone tells you what they think looks incorrect about your work and maybe how you could have done it better you shouldnt get upset. Things like that are invaluable for us to get a fresh perspective on our creations. Now if someone is just being negative with no explanation of what it is they dont like about it then their opinion is probably no help to you anyways. I wish more people were critical of my own work but most people think its impolite. I just want to know what others honestly think so I can try to see my own art through new eyes. So anyone reading this feel free to visit my page and tell me how much you think I suck! :D (Big Grin) 
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:iconjoanabranquinho:
JoanaBranquinho Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2013  Student General Artist
keep on going!! I wish i could talk with you more, i wished i could be lost i the world, like you were, but i have people who are always bugging me, always tell me what i should do, always tell me that i´m lost in my own delusional world....but the truth is, i want to be in that delusional world!! I have so many things that i want to write, but whenever i try to...it´s impossible to finish. it's a bummer! But know that i see your world through your words i see that i should give up just because what people are saying, plus i´m getting tired that i cant do what i wanna do...sorry and big thanks ;)
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:iconhuskyfun:
Huskyfun Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
<font><font>Cada artista en este mundo tiene su propio mundo, viven pensando que su mundo es malo, es negarse a sí mismo, cada uno expresa de forma diferente, se podría decir que la duda es algo que nos pasa a todos, todos tenemos un punto de vista, y si considera que no está en el lugar que usted debe, significa que no está brillando, el tipo de luz que emiten, debe ser de un color que seguramente nunca había visto a nadie, pero para que alguien sea cautivado por tu luz, que brille, hacer de su arte como desee, sin temor a la crítica, esto es bueno y aparecerá la gente adecuada, el camino correcto y encontrar el lugar donde quieres estar, porque estoy seguro de que entre los millones y millones de almas, una o más están cautivados con la luz auténtica que emiten desde dentro, a través de su arte único.</font></font>
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:iconwonder-565:
wonder-565 Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Hobbyist

Only recently stumbling across you I agree with the masses that your work is amazing. Artist's block is never nice for anyone, let alone with feeling the added pressure from people considering it as an example.
Maybe take a break from uploading work? Draw what you want to and how you want to, ignore what other people say or do, it's your creation after all.

I'm sorry you feel this way, but all the best that everything gets better soon. ^.^

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:iconcaracitrine:
CaraCitrine Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Student Digital Artist
The worst mistake anyone can make is being too afraid to make one.

You will definitely make an error somewhere along the way, but it won't be what you expected, and the things you worried about won't be nearly as important when they happen as they were when you thought of them. The only way to get to the top of the mountain is to make your own path.

Also, I highly suggest mind mapping.
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:iconhakuthewolf:
Hakuthewolf Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Student Filmographer
To everyone reading this post who doesn't understand Dutch, sorry... Google-translate it or something if you want to understand.

Damai, mag ik je zo noemen? Ik begrijp heel goed waar je in zit, zelfs al maak ik dit niet zelf mee. Ik kan het me heel goed voorstellen en het is gewoon een vervelende situatie als je onzeker bent over jezelf. Maar weet dat je watchers er niet alleen zijn om te genieten van je art, maar ook om je te supporten als je het even moeilijk hebt. Het feit dat je als voorbeeld gezien wordt betekent niet dat je alleen maar über-perfecte dingen mag posten... Het betekent dat mensen je waarderen voor je skills, want die heb je zeker. Soms ga je heel snel vooruit en word je steeds beter, andere keren duurt het even wat langer voor je iets nieuws onder de knie hebt, maar dat maakt allemaal niet uit. Het is deel van een leerproces en ik denk dat het belangrijk is dat je jezelf dat leerproces gunt. Ik bedoel dit echt niet op een harde manier, maar meer op een manier van "kijk naar wat belangrijk is voor jou als persoon". Uiteindelijk gaat het er toch om dat je je lekker voelt met jezelf. Andere mensen doen er in dat opzicht niet toe. Als jij iets wil posten wat derpy is en waarvan er echt niet denderend veel skill aan te bekennen is, moet je dat gewoon lekker doen. Dat laat ook je menselijkheid zien. Iedereen doodelt wel eens, iedereen zit wel eens vast en moet dan gewoon even een paar domme tekeningen maken voordat ze weer verder kunnen... Of niet. Misschien blijven ze wel even stil staan... En dat is ook goed, dat mag. Niemand zal je er minder leuk om vinden. 

Ik maak half niet zulke mooie dingen als jij, maar ik ben wel heel erg blij met de dingen die ik maak, want het laat zien dat ik beter ben geworden in tekenen, het laat zien dat ik gegroeid ben. Op de kunstacademie leer ik elke dag weer nieuwe dingen en elke week na model-tekenen heb ik weer iets nieuws geleerd over hoe ik bepaalde dingen in een tekening voor elkaar moet krijgen. Dan gaat het maar wat langzamer, maar ik neem het allemaal gretig in me op en als ik zie dat ik het goed kan toepassen ben ik helemaal in mijn nopjes. Ik verdeel mijn doelen in kleine stapjes, zodat ik bij elke stap vooruit een feest-momentje heb. Misschien is een soortgelijke aanpak voor jou ook mooi? Telkens als je iets hebt bereikt dat je graag wilde bereiken (hoe klein ook) heb je even een feest-momentje en mag je trots op jezelf zijn. Je mag een koekje, weet ik veel, of een leuk tijdschrift. Of misschien wel gewoon even blij ronddansen of gewoon met een mega-grijns op je gezicht rondlopen. Hoe dan ook, zorg ervoor dat je jouw eigen kleine victories viert, want dat is het zo waard. 

In ieder geval vind ik het belangrijk dat je weet dat ik heel erg geniet van de dingen die je maakt, maar ook dat ik net zo goed zal genieten als je even een domme tekening online zet. Ik vind het leuk om je te watchen en ik ben er heel dankbaar voor dat je je werk online zet, wat voor werk dan ook. En ik ben er ook heel dankbaar voor dat je je onzekerheid deelt met ons, je watchers. Dat is een moeilijk iets, maar ik vind dat je het super gedaan hebt. Je bent een kanjer, dat je 't weet. 
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:iconinsomnianfae:
InsomnianFae Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Student Photographer
your art sucks.....


Peace *JuSt KiDDiNg* Peace
 
you know it does not,  so I don't need to tell you, just wanted to make a difference to all the other posts^^
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:iconinsomnianfae:
InsomnianFae Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Student Photographer
The most important thing you need to do is relax.... stay away from it and just get some air, some time for yourself and dont give a damn to any pressure or what people might thin or say... inspiration gets back to you as soon as it wants and all you can do is focus on other things in the meantime. i'm sure there are a lot of other things you enjoyed before you started doing art again. so here's your time to enjoy them again. everybody needs a break sometimes.
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:icon4ud1b31:
4ud1b31 Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013
I hate to say this because it's something that you hear or read and roll your eyes and say:  "yeah you're right," but sane, compassionate, rationale human beings very rarely feel comfortable in their own skin until their 30s.  There's nothing wrong with feeling insecure, but don't let it keep you back from accomplishing what you want to do in life.  It looks to me that you are very talented, and as long as you are enjoying what you're doing, don't ever feel like you have to be more than what you are.  Wow, that's absolutely naff.  Ok, I'm done.  
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:icondamaimikaz:
DamaiMikaz Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Well... I'm soon getting 26 years old. It would be about time.
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:iconlilium11597:
lilium11597 Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I always feel the exact same way :< it sucks to think youre not good enough but you're freaking amazing!
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:iconsatinsky:
satinsky Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
One thing to keep in mind is that it is not just about skill. As far as I can tell you are very active in the community here and people respect that. You don't just bring your art but you :) And there is what you get out of making the work that you do. If it helps you and other people enjoy it, then you are doing exactly the right thing!
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:iconlastredfox:
LastRedFox Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
The insecurity only can say one Thing... you are a Artist! the feelings take one big responsability in ours works and made us more creatives and improve. Take this don like a special skill and enjoy it, the inspiration always likes leave and come back... :)
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:iconprincesspeachypeach:
PrincessPeachyPeach Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Lots of great artists have insecurities about their work; We're all human..
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:iconvirnagray:
virnagray Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist

Wow! This is apparently a common feeling in an artists life, even among people that are obviously good like you.

 

I pretty much have to learn everything on my own, starting with English... when I got to the U.S I did not speak any English and the job I got was was salling magazines door to door across the country.

 

 With in a month I understood everyone most of the time but they sure did not understand a word I was saying, it took several frustrating months, and sometimes if I am in a place like Kentucky when I speak, people look at my husband in a "what did she said kind of way..."

 

And just like in that story, the things I learn on my own, like drawing or painting I absolutely doubt myself.

 

Wondering how much better I would be if someone actually teach me in stead of me trying to learn on my own,  especially "writing" since in that category I don't get a single comment,

that kind of let me know I suck, I just don't know how much since people won't say a word when they read my stuff LOL.

 

also afraid that people would see my stuff and say that's garbage,

but even when I am afraid and have little to no technic I still make things, simply because it makes me happy to come up with new stuff:) 

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:iconmanimeminam:
ManimeminaM Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013  Student Filmographer
In my - and I’m pretty sure lots of other’s – opinion that insecurity is part of being an artist of any sort. The youtube user Sycra made a video on the subject of insecurity and artist-blocks and he basically said that your art consists out of 2 factors; the quality of your art and your ‘eye’. It’s quite interesting, here is the link if you want to check it out; www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qb0g_g…
It might not help in any way, but at least it gave me some insight in how it works.

However, as you said, the problem is not only that you might your art isn’t that great but also your rising fame on here.
I can’t give you any real advice on that matter for obvious reasons, but then again, sometimes it’s easier to analyze a problem from a distance. You struggle with being called an example since you feel like you owe it to those people to only create great things and also have to act like an example – however that might be.
However, think about it: all your watchers followed you because they thought your art was looking good, because your stories amused or touched them or because they liked your opinions that you wrote down in your journals. I can imagine there being a lot of pressure with the amount of attention you get here, but it all comes down to the fact that you’ve gotten this far simply by being yourself and doing what you liked. There is absolutely no reason to change that.

Furthermore, when it comes to people you an example, I bet you yourself have lots of examples that inspire you to continue doing what you like to do. Are all of their galleries filled with perfect work where no one can point out anything that might have been done better? I bet not.
Even though it’s personal, if I look at my examples on here and in real life they all show some ‘flaws’ in their work or character, which only makes them more interesting. I personally don’t care about the artist that only has perfect art in their gallery, they become boring.
You don’t. I think the reason why people might view you as an example is because you didn’t seem to be afraid on here to voice your opinion, show your work and use the critique you got on them to become better. They might see you as an example because you show progress and thát’s what inspires others to try and do the same.

It’s easier said than done, but try and create your work for yourself as you’ve done so far, instead of creating stories, art and voicing opinions for the sake of others.
I would like to end this rant with a quote that, if I remember correctly, you yourself used as a signature on a certain forum once, which holds up more now than ever it seems.
“Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self”.
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:iconesoteric319:
Esoteric319 Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2013
I second this. The last line beautifully surmises the whole message.

There will always be people who will love your artwork and some will dislike. And few might remain neutral. :D And among these, there will be some who will make discouraging/derogatory remarks. One shouldn't let such worthless remarks affect his|her work. On the other hand, a well-informed, well-rounded criticism can go a long way in improving oneself as an artist. Due to our biases, we might fail to see from certain perspectives. Constructive criticism provides that. World is full of cynicism and negativity. Still, there are so many 'Deviants' here, willing to support and promote the work of others. :)

I think, art is something that can provide a niche for each and everyone who has the will to keep improving. From what I gather (in my week as a deviant =P ) you (DamaiMikaz) embody that sentiment. May be that is the reason why most others look up to you as an inspiration.

Anyways, continue to love your art and continue to amaze your watchers. Good luck!! Hi!
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:iconn-h-art:
N-H-Art Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I've had more art blocks then I can remember (and I don't even have a fan-base to feel insecure about). I've sort of developed my own 'ritual' against it. The thing I noticed most in your journal is that you're very insecure about your art, I have that too. The difference is just that you have a LOT more watchers compared to... well, everyone I know.
The easiest way for me to overcome a block is simply writing, without thinking. Let the story write itself. Don't doubt, don't feel insecure, don't THINK. Just have fun.
Then, when you're done, put it away for a little while (30 mins.) and do something else. Again, no feeling insecure or thinking about your story. Let someone else read it, someone you trust will give you an honest and unbiased opinion. Ask how he/she feels about it. Only now should you read it again, think a just a little bit. Change your grammar mistakes, reform sentences to sound better and think about where your story is going. You can also write out a few different scenarios and then simply choose the one you like most.
Anyway art block isn't a failure, it happens to everyone. No one will say you've disappointed them if you make a mistake. Also (no offence) I didn't think of you as being "oh-so-perfect", the reason I watched you was simply because I thought you weren't afraid of voicing your opinion and I admired that. Because I never do, simply to avoid trouble.
I hope you (re)find your inspiration to write. Sorry for the long comment..
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:iconwolf--eyes:
wolf--eyes Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013
For some reason I can really relate to this, I write in my free time and I can't even bring myself to let my best friends read my drafts. I keep thinking that I'm the only one who could possibly think that what I write is "good" and I always try -and succeed- to find flaws in my texts. Anyway, what you post doesn't always have to be very detailed and perfected, personnally I like to see some sketches now and then :)
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:iconopalmartin:
Opalmartin Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Student General Artist
Sometimes a doodle page of insanity can help stop art block because it can have as many characters/ mini scenarios drawn good or bad etc. Then the ones that you like you can add more details too. My main point is that you can't just draw something amazing instantly every time. sometimes things need to be fleshed out for awhile before really working on things. If you are worried about your quality, try a different art style, maybe it will work better with the character or story in mind.
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:iconlandonfranklin:
LandonFranklin Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
That's something that is never easy to deal with. I know I feel the same way many times. I think the thing to focus on isn't what people are saying, or not saying, but to enjoy what you are doing. Have fun and  if you aren't having fun take a bit of a break and figure out why. Being an artist has it's own challenges but also it's own reward. And listen to the advice to seem to be getting here. It seems quite sound!
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:iconanarchistrose:
AnarchistRose Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This relates to so many, but especially me! Thank you letting everyone know that this does actually happen to others besides them!
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:iconwulfnstein:
wulfnstein Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013
You're right about the fact that every artist has the doubt about themselves. You are the second great artist I know that has mentioned how they can doubt themselves. Not sure if this is nice or evil, but I feel kinda happy knowing even the great have doubt. Cause that makes it easier for me to keep on making drawings. Knowing that the doubt I feel is normal and I shouldn't be discouraged by it. I guess doubt and artblock is the most widespread problem throughout the artistic world. I'll have to put some scientist on that, see if they can fix it :D
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:iconshadyzombie:
shadyzombie Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist

I seem to do the same thing man, all artists do to a degree, but that's what drives an artist, because what an artist explores doesn't exist yet

 

versus a scientist, or technician who is driven to understand the practical, what actually exists

 

those are two examples, but it seems the world doesn't change as much as I first thought no matter which side ur on.

 

 

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:iconluckymangaka:
LuckyMangaka Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Student General Artist
Damai, chill. 
Big shot or not you are just human. 
I need to be quick typing this but, you ARE HUMAN. YOU WILL MAKE MISTAKES. 
I did this originally with mine (manga) thinking oh its just too this or that.
Bullpoopie. 
Look at what some people post. Theres a legitimate reason. And you are naturally good at writing. 
Your human, you can make mistakes, like my grammar mistake there.
Put your soul into it though and it will flow freely, but your in block because of doubt find your confidence again.
From someone who knows 
~L.M.
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:iconmysticflamer:
MysticFlamer Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Professional General Artist
Damai dear trust me you are not alone in this at all. Many artists I am sure go through this phase. I do it all the time. And I am still insecure about my art but that will never change. We all like someones art and we want to get to their level. Regardless someone is always in front of you and there are people behind you. Instead of seeing it as a negative thing see it as a challenge for yourself. Take something old and redo it. Stuck try playing a game, reading your favorite novel, listen to music outside of your comfortzone, look at some of your followers artworks. You have many options for gaining inspiration. As far as the pressure goes you have a handful that will help you with your art if you want to improve, those who will just comment of just fave and move on then you have those who will point out things you missed. As an artist and as a writer even we should take the time to enjoy what we do because when we finish it is a reflection of our passion. Things I never had to much care for ended up being rushed and turned out horrible. But something I took my time and enjoyed turned out beautiful in my eyes as a sign of improvement. Of course people will judge. Many are very judgmental but please don't let that stop you.

You are brave to admit it to your fans while I only have a selected amount of people I share my epic fails to. If you need a break from the "popular" trend take a break because when you aren't enjoying it you won't do it. So take a break relax and collect yourself back together. Come back when you feel completely refreshed and invigorated. Chat with friends, make new friends, and do something different to help you relax. I am sure everyone will be here otherwise can you truly call them a fan? Anyways take all the time you need dear. I would prefer you to take a break compared to rush yourself. Take care of yourself Damai and I look forward to seeing you refreshed!
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:iconeffervescentelixir:
EffervescentElixir Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013
Art-block/writers-block isn't a failure! Everyone gets stuck sometimes, even the REALLY professional artists/writers.

“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.”
-Roald Dahl.

It'll come to you, don't push it. The more you worry, the worse it becomes. :) And as for feeling insecure, probably nothing I say will stop you feeling insecure, but I'd still like to say that I think your work is absolutely amazing! :D

:iconblushplz:

Here's some great quotes to help you:
flavorwire.com/343207/13-famou…

Also, if you're getting stuck, you're probably drawing for others. What's important when drawing or writing is to do what YOU like, not what everyone ELSE likes. THAT's what makes a good artist great, because if YOU like it, and have fun with it, it's really easy to see in the results.
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:iconshadowsketch91:
ShadowSketch91 Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
i think others before me said this a lot of times already... don't care for what others say, some people who give bullshit comments are probably not even that good themselves... you have your style, and no one is going to take that away from you, and even if there are so many watchers checking your every piece, screw that, they enjoy your art, whether it's sketches or finished work, people will enjoy it anyway.... because if it's sketches, they see how you go to work, and a lot people learn from that.... 
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:icontheparaddict:
TheParaddict Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013   General Artist
Yeah I know what you're saying I have big dreams but along the way I still face fear of failure when it comes to other art that looks better even thought I've achieved much success since high school my art sucked since then but life is a challenge and art has expectations
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:iconbloodthirstyreader:
BloodThirstyReader Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist
You just need to do what you want to and ignore the people who don't like it... What i'm trying to say is people look up to you for being you so theres no point in thinking about it to much !! I mean if you want to write something that you like then write it don't be afraid of what others are going to think I mean they've all followed you for a reason right? So all your work doesn't have to be perfect because nothings perfect so draw terrible from time to time and do what YOU want to because people are gonna love you either way :) 
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:iconelvenwyn:
Elvenwyn Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Student Digital Artist
I will admit I have a whole load of characters in my head and I'm not ready to share their stories to the public (the true reason I won't say for it would sound extremely ridiculous and I mean that) and I have taken the first step of painting certain characters and sharing them. I'm mentioning this because almost everyday I'm coming up with new characters in the main character's storyline. The characters that take leading roles (being evil, a new main character, lover, family member, friend, etc) I try not making them stereotyped by making non-ridiculous changes to what they are (except if they may be a broody character). For example, in my world there are angels that are almost invincible to all the other races of existing beings except for the demons, the demons (and of course angels) can kill the angels because I made the situation in such a way that a long time ago millions of angels fell from the heavens (because the heavens broke apart) and became demons within 24 hours of landing on the world below (if they survived the fall); hence why they and their demon descendants can kill the angels. I also have the demons divided in different races with different personalities to their race and the extremely different demons that are extremely powerful with their own unique powers for variety.

I know what I wrote about what I did with the demons are probably inspired by a lot of things (probably from stuff I don't even know of too). Anyway, to the point, I too, am scared what people might think of my stories I've made up and what my characters are like. I mean, I have a character that wears an outfit that makes him look gay (which he most definitely is not) to many people but I don't care because he likes dressing that way and it also shows what kind of person he is (and he is a really cool character).
So if you share your characters it's natural to be scared of how people may judge them, but it's how the character looks and act because that's who they are.

Also another thing, when I enter a competition, every time I enter I think that I probably won't win, but I enter anyway for the experience and because I have a small sliver of hope that makes me think I might win no matter what my art looks like compared to the others' work. So when you feel insecure just try and pull yourself together and find that little piece of hope to make you feel strong and inspire you.

Apologies for the long comment, but I hope this is useful to you. :)
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:iconcalicara:
Calicara Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Student Writer
The reason I like you as an artist is because of your ability to openly express yourself. Not only can you draw well, but you draw what you feel irregardless of how others might react.

Personally, sometimes I will go to start a project, but then I think what if... what if I get criticized due to the content of my work... what if someone finds what I make offensive... because often it can be hard to be real. It can be hard to hold a firm opinion on some topics and stay true to it, even when there are others who disagree.

Art though should not always be made to please. Art should be an artists artistic expression, even if sometimes bizarre or strange, art is much more powerful (to me) when it is real and raw and interesting to look at (and not the same overused fan-art and chbi styles which plague the internet.)

That is why I think you are sometimes sort of an inspiration. You seem to tend to stay true to yourself, and though I'm sure all artists go through the same artistic anxiety it's not a bad thing. If you see something that is wrong than you will work to fix it, and so you will continue to improve. Then one day you will look back at your old drawings (comparatively) and see how you have grown.

So, don't feel like you're the only one. I'm sure there are lots of artists in a similar position (one also being myself), just keep doing what you love and love what you do. It's ok to feel insecure, but don't let your insecurities bring you down. You should keep trying no matter how many obstacles are thrown in your path and I'm sure you'll get to where you want to be one day. If you get rejected at first, well hey it happens, but just don't forget to learn from your experience so you can improve in the future ^__^
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:iconneuracore:
Neuracore Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013
Being blocked by positive comments... -_-! OK, let's try this: my own art is more imperfect than yours! :P
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:icons-e-l-a:
S-e-l-a Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
you're so worried that your followers and watchers and whatnots will not appreciate what you do? then they wouldn't have followed you in the first place! look how far you've come, stop dwelling on the what if-s like "what if they don't like it" or "what if i'm rejected" .... still i say it's better to try and see what happens, then to spend your time thinking "what would have happened if i tried?" i prefer to take the pain of failure over the pain of the endless thought of regret of "not trying". everytime you fail, you learn something new, and find a loose screw in yourself that needs fixing. never be afraid of being judged and criticized, it will only work for making a better you :)
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:iconcountesshalcyon:
CountessHalcyon Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Hey. I have a very dear friend who is a great artist too, and no matter what she does she is never happy. I know that it isn't because of her drawing skill, though she completely doubts  that too... she is my best friend and I can tell you that I know that her insecurity doesn't come from her art...her insecurity in art is the result of something much much deeper...a heart issue. I think she hasn't dealt with some things yet, and she is pretty messed up right now and is having a terrible art block. Your art IS beautiful and you, yes, do digital things that I wish I could do, but I am here to tell you.... DO NOT be a people pleaser ALL the time. It will suck the life right out of you and make you a perfectionism victim. i know from my own personal experience. Be yourself, no matter how weird or how obscure you might see yourself being against others and their views. And please don't listen to the voice that is saying that you are never enough. That voice lies again and again. I know that voice too and I can tell you outright, it is a sick liar. We as humans are all made different from the other to compliment each other in variation. Also we are imperfect, and we all...shouldn't have to feel like we must produce something perfect, because that is truthfully impossible. Art is BEAUTIFUL because it's own imperfections. It shows character and feeling. I am so glad you were able to voice your opinions and show others that you are human, behind your art. I think that is a noble thing. Know that I am praying for you, and that God loves you. He gave you this gift for a reason. Thanks again for writing your journal. I pray that things look up for you and that you get direction and passion back into your art. Don't stop doing what you do. Hope your day and week goes extremely well. ~ CountessHalcyon
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